Article On Mentoring: Real Life Examples

This article on mentoring is about a recent mentoring session I had with a wonderful woman that I had just agreed to meet with and mentor.

The primary focus of this article is to ask yourself if you ever really think about whether you are a leader or not?

Prior to our very first meeting I asked her to consider what she felt the differences were between a leader and a manager.

I also asked her to consider what she believed her greatest strength was, as well as, her greatest weakness.

After we began and talked for a few minutes I asked her what she would like to get out of our meetings together.

article on mentoring

Article on Mentoring: Caring for him was taking more and more of her time!

She paused for a minute and then said that she really wasn't trying to advance her career, but more importantly was trying to become a better leader of her home and personal situation.

We spoke a little more and after I asked several more questions, she explained that her husband had MS and was pretty much confined to their home. Caring for him was taking more and more of her time, which was the reason she went from full time to part time work. This also put a strain on their finances.

She absolutely loved helping out at her church, but between caring for her husband and her job it was becoming harder and harder to manage.

I asked about her children.  She had two young adult's that were struggling a bit because of their father’s situation.

After speaking a little more, I asked her what she thought was her greatest weakness.

She hesitated a bit and said that she didn't think she was a very good leader.  She didn't think that she was handling everything in her life very well and that a good leader would take charge of the situation and solve the problems she was facing.

Article on Mentoring: She was making decisions for the future care of her husband!

After a little more conversation, I was able to see that based on everything she had told me about, that in fact she was handling more than most people could stand, yet she was excelling at work, at her church, and most likely at home.

Her two daughters were rebounding from their father’s situation mostly because of her leadership.

She just finished a mission trip with her church, which most of us would not take the time to worry about if we had the same situation to deal with.

And finally, she was making decisions now for the future of her husband’s care, which meant that she was looking past today into tomorrow.

These are all signs of a very good leader if not great one!

I finished our first meeting by telling her I believed that what she thought was her greatest weakness was probably her greatest strength! That she was rising above the issue of her life and taking them on with common sense and determination.  That she wasn't running from them or having a pity party! Yes she was a great leader in her own way!

Thank you and May God Bless You!

She Wanted a New House and He Didn't

This article on mentoring is about a session I had with an individual that was nearing retirement with her husband.

Earlier in life they both agreed they would save for their dream house, but now because of the recent economy her husband is worried about having enough money for retirement and she still wants her Dream House.

As a mentor you often find yourself wanting to side with whoever you are mentoring; however, I caution you on this approach.  Your mission as a mentor is to help them see a clear or clearer solution to their issue. I say issue and not problem, because all discussion you have are not necessarily problems.

The woman explained that they had saved for their entire lives for the Dream House and she wanted to follow through with their agreement. 

Article on Mentoring:  Fund may fluctuate greatly up or down!

Her husband was extremely worried that if they in fact did build the Dream House that it would affect their retirement is ways such as traveling. He did not want to be tied down to a new house and the responsibilities that go along with it.

Although I was only meeting with her, I realized both had good points and deserved to be look into further.

I asked extensive questions about the finances and found that she was sound in her vision in that they seemed to have enough saved to pay cash for the home.

On the other hand, because of the economy her husband was sound in his thinking also since the remaining funds may fluctuate greatly up or down. Of course, the up part wouldn't be a problem, but the down sure would.

After a lengthy meeting we decided that both would agree on a financial planner to review their situation and give their professional opinion of what would be wise. Of course, she would have to get her husband’s support, but she thought that this would be a good approach.

So, my role as a mentor was not to decide who was right. It was to help her find a way to uncover all the facts and then make a wise decision based on those and not emotion.

Thank you for reviewing this article on mentoring and May God Bless You!