Children with Bi Polar Disorder and Schizophrenia - It’s Hell on EarthFor anyone that has dealt with a child with mental health issues, especially bi polar disorder or schizophrenia, I don't have to tell you that it is pure hell on earth. As parents, my wife and I struggle everyday with the guilt of not being able to do enough for our child. As the leader of our home I am continually looking for a better way to handle this never ending battle. Our son is now twenty-one years old and although he is living in an apartment on his own, we must visit every single day to make sure he takes his medicine. He will never have what we would call a normal life. It just breaks our hearts to think that the little sweet innocent baby boy that we brought into our home at the very young age of three months old will most likely never hold a job or have a family of his own. Anyone that doesn't think that bi polar disorder or schizophrenia is not a crippling disease, needs to witness the life of our adopted son. He used to love to drive! He took the bonds that his grandfather had been given to him every birthday since his very first one and bought a car at his graduation. He also enrolled in a Trade School to become an industrial electrician. I can't tell you how excited we all were for him even though at that time the only thing that had manifested itself was the bi polar disorder. My wife and I helped out by taking out a college loan in our name to help pay for the schooling and books. He had just turned eighteen a few months earlier. I guess he made it through about four weeks of school before he began missing a day here and a day there. Before you know it he was missing two or three days at a time. Not long after he dropped out completely. We were very upset with him at that point not knowing or understanding that he not only had bi polar disorder but now he was beginning to take on the mental illness of schizophrenia. We had no idea except that we began to see stranger and stranger behavior from him. It wasn't long after this that he totaled out his car on one winter day. He was driving too fast and slid it into a tree right in front of someone's home. We still didn't fully understand the illness at this point and just believed he was being irresponsible. He had dropped out of college, wrecked his car, didn't have a job, and wanted to sleep all the time. In our book he was just being lazy and irresponsible. What we didn't realize was that the pacing, talking to no one, the sleeping, the erratic behavior was all part of bi polar disorder and schizophrenia disease. The unfortunate thing was that this was only the tip of the ice berg. All hell was beginning to reveal itself and we didn't have one clue what we were in store for. His bedroom was in the basement and he spent hours and hours down there for the most part sleeping. However, then he would spend most of his nights up, going through the refrigerator and cupboards making mess after mess. Not to mention that he was walking throughout the house making noise and keeping the rest of us awake. Argument after argument occurred, but no progress was made. If you have any understanding of bi polar disorder or schizophrenia you will know that without the right medicine it gets completely out of control. Well that was exactly what was happening. In the true sense of the word, things were getting crazy. Our solution was that we needed to be more forceful and demanding of what we expected of him. Wrong answer, at least in our case! He was becoming more and more delusional. He began referring to the house as his and we were guest there. He began unusual gestures with his hands and head. He would stare right through you without saying a word while you would be talking with him. After a few seconds he would then answer a question you might have asked two or three minutes ago. He became more and more aggressive in his behavior. His mother began to get frightened of him. This all continued until the day he completely exploded into violence. He swung and struck his mother in the eye. Although I wanted to unload on him, I took him to the floor and held there until the police arrived. I never used that much energy to hold a person down. He struggled with every ounce of his being to get loose. I was not about to let that happen until the police arrive. He would bite my arm that I have around his neck and face. I spent twelve years in the Marine Corps and never did I experience anything so completely out of control. I know that I wanted to beat him to a pulp but could not because he was my son. The police finally arrived and was able to hand cuff him. They knew immediately that he had some type of mental health issues. They didn't arrest him based on our pleas to get him mental health help. They instead placed him on a hold in a local mental health locked ward. Once he was evaluated they immediately determined he had not only bi polar disorder, but also schizophrenia. It was like a light went on for my wife and I. It was good to know that there was a reason for his behavior and not that he was just a misfit. That has not made life any easier, but now we understand more about it. As a matter of fact we are becoming experts through the school of hard knocks. Not a school you want to attend, trust me. If you're a parent who has a child with either bi polar disorder or schizophrenia, trust me when I tell you that we understand. Get help and stay focused. Best of luck, God Bless |
